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London City Hall. GLA and London Mayor Building.

Status: Prime London beauty spot ruined.

I just cant believe this. For years and years of my life, one of the most lovely views of London had to be from the Tower Hotel Bar, looking out at the world famous Tower Bridge. I could sit there and dream under the spell of a subtle Gin & Tonic. Well, not any more. Imagine my non-delight when recently I looked out from my comfy hotel seat to see the best view in the cosmos vandalised by that sick joke of a carbuncle, the new City Hall. Some larkitect architect is definately having the last laugh at us.


London City Hall GLA, ken livingtones offices


Once, dear readers, the immediate backdrop to our mighty Bridge (and London's emblem) would be set with complimentary ancient warehouses and dickensian walkways, letting the truly flavoured buildings of London, (like the Bridge and the Tower) command the panorama. Now, I was looking through the middle square of the Bridge, and all I could see was this damned stupid Twisted Headlamp. Ultimately, I couldnt bloody take my eyes of it. My word, what a crass carbuncle, what a horrid sight, and why there, of all places?


London City Hall GLA, london mayor building


This putrid Testicle, is, in a word, crap. Its the worst of the worst sixties type developer drivel forced into a critical spot within London's dreamscape. The frontage is bearable, that being a glossy curtain of tinted glass which hangs upon the building frame, 'neath which a set of huge revolving doors bids a welcome to the innards. But step back from this, and you see the rest of the block is detailed in an awfully cheap looking stepped floor structure, with an incredibly cheap frame finish. The window design here, copied from the top of the British Telecom Tower, does not translate well into this formation. There is no dynamic excitement to compensate for its lackluster look. It's so ugly. This experiment desperately needed to have perfect proportions and a most excellent sheen. But on examination, it's like a deflated football, with an appearance falling well short of its initial artistic impressions.

This attempt to recreate the NYC Guggenheim amongst London's heritage is a shocking failure. This is just another dropping by the architect Lord Wobblebridge Foster, and this latest Foster's Folly is by far the worstest wobble he's ever produced. The interior features could probably hold their own, but on the outside, its a withered prune, a blot on the fruitscape. This rediculous building shape does not look too well at all at every angle. A true creator would have seen this. Most views make it look like a bit of a cock up, a shabby job, hopefully soon to fall over to make way for something nice. If this be an exercise in stupidity, then it should be hidden from view, like somewhere out to sea, not amongst our national treasures.

So there it is. If nothing, it is a constant reminder that we, as Londoners, always end up paying for these things. Thanks to Korruptable Ken, we're now paying more and more extortionately foul Council Tax for all this Mayoral fiasco. It's yet another layer of bureaucracy that we didnt need, with that self-publicity mad Mayor, a crackpot political agenda, and a bunch of hangers-on, all bundled into one multi million pound carbuncle that lays waste to London's most spectacular silhouette.

Why couldn't they have converted all of those old warehouses that were once there? Why couldn't they have shunted Red Ken into the now flattened Marsham Street complex? Its a shame we've been hit by another carbuncle instead, and, like all the best carbuncles, they've used my cash to set it up. Hey! Here's the shirt off my back.

Charles (of London Town)

E-Mail Charles at: londondestruction@yahoo.com

The London Destruction Website.
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